Appendix 11. The Human Righteousness We Cannot Let Go Of

What grieves me most in ministry is seeing members who cannot let go of their own righteousness. Of course, after hearing the word, they try to show humility. But sometimes that very effort makes them think they have a mature faith, because they are humble, gentle, and full of mercy. It is because they have lived their faith this way that they stay in the same place, even after years of learning and hearing the word. It pains me all the more that they remain absorbed in hobbies no different from those of the world, and go on repeating foolish behavior, yet never realize it. How can I teach them to see that the leper Jesus healed is them, the paralytic is them, the widow is them, the orphan is them… Perhaps I feel all the more afraid because I, too, am among them. Being just as foolish myself, I am afraid before anything else, but the truth is that I want them to be loved by God even more than I am.

It saddens me to see God’s people unable to bind the word and their lives together, because the notion that the word is the word and life is life never breaks. Only when the living word enters into life and is applied hour by hour, problem by problem, person by person, can it lead a person’s life; yet they have built two rooms and keep them strictly apart, so that the two never mix. If only they would give God the time and the space to lead their lives, he would make a work far more beautiful than anything they have made themselves, and it grieves me deeply that they will not entrust it to him. Without ever handing it over, they pray to God to help them with their lives. Looking at them, God seems to be saying: What on earth do you want me to do?… You will not give me the least room, so what is it you want my help with? You run ahead of me, ruin everything, then turn around and ask what you should do—how can I help you? Those who say they have faith do not know what human righteousness is.